Due to many, many complaints about guards being overly talkative during
raids (and often long after them), an extensive investigation into the
training and operation of the guard services of the cities of Sapience
was launched.

It was discovered that an accidental contamination of the traditional
bitter beer drunk by guards across the entire continent was causing them
all to be extremely longsighted! They saw people far outside of the
city, and, believing them to be within the room they were in and unable
due to distance to tell whether they were enemies or not, shouted that
they were being attacked.

In light of this, I have convinced every single city guard to attend
regular meetings to curb their beer addiction, lest such a tragedy occur
again. I expect any drunken city guards to be drummed out of their
city's service. Now that they are all clean and sober, they should not
only be able to distinguish an enemy from a peaceful visitor, but will
only report sightings of enemies at their location, rather than
anywhere.

Penned by my hand on the 23rd of Slyphian, in the year 204 MA.