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Public News Post #6068

SPIREAN GAZETTE NO: 1 (Do Not Read Sober)

Written by: Kalak Vaelinos
Date: Thursday, May 4th, 2017
Addressed to: Everyone



Spirean Gazette, a labor of passion and unconditional love, is finally a
part of our lives. Today we are starting a long journey along the people
of Sapience and our readers can be assured that no matter what, we will
not give any compromise from our impeccable journalism ethics. Now, to
honor our first issue we were able to arrange a very exclusive interview
with none other then the Regent of Bloodloch, Lady Alathesia! If you can
survive all the news and advertisements spattered across the gazette,
you will reach to the segment where you can read her striking
assessments and thoughts upon Enorian and Duiran! Now without further
ado I present you the first issue of Spirean Gazette!
-Mr. Spires (Editor)

DISCLAIMER: This publication IS NOT endorsed, funded or supported by
Spinesreach in any official capacity. Readers are fully responsible for
the mental disturbances they might experience while reading this gazette
and the senile old man who delivered this issue to the distribution
center should be considered exempt from any responsibility.

1. STORMY MAGE SAVES DAMSEL IN DISTRESS!

This is the story of a man who does what is necessary, when is
necessary...without even thinking about the harm which may fall upon
himself. Yes, you guessed right dear readers, we are talking about
Tekias Uymari, the man who single-handedly brought crystalline entities
to their knees. At that time he had no grand titles like Grand Courser
and Elder, he was a simple Storm Mage with simple ideas within his mind.
But one day...some unexpected visitors appeared in front of him:
Archmage Siofra Elindian and two massive, glistening crystalline
entities! The damsel's hands were shaking and eyes were unfocused, but
brave Mage Tekias turned those malevolent entities into fine powder with
nothing but a flick of wrist. Rest of the exchange was no diplomacy, oh
dear readers, it was a brutal domination of Siofra's will by the Storm
Mage. So brutal, that she was given the menial task of creating
insignificant devices to put an end to this nightmare. As the lesser
entities gathered around their Master Entity, Tekias charged through
them cutting a straight line to the hulking crystalline monster, with
cold determination in his eyes. After he ripped the head (or arm...or
leg...or...one is never sure with these entities) of the Master Entity
with bare hands, bypassers applauded loudly and went wild with cheers.
As for the damsel? She swooned right over there for all of these were
too much for her frail body. Our reporters tried to get a comment from
Mage Tekias, but he remained silent and departed for future quests to
rid the Sapience of its problems.

2. DREIKATHI GAMBIT STIMULATES THE SATURATED ECONOMY!

Some months ago, a group of Haekathi decided to visit our esteemed
continent with a few battalions to cause trouble on Esterport. While
they were no match for the armies of Spinesreach aided with token forces
from other cities, it was found to be a misdirection in order to grab
Master Crystals of Sciomancers and Ascendril. Or was it? No long after,
it was understood that they brought friends with themselves; sticky,
stalky and definitely lethal. Now, dear readers this is not the story of
how Spireans saved the world once again, because that is a well-known
fact. Here rather we tried to focus our attention upon the economical
impacts of this gambit played by the Dreikathi masterminds. At first it
caused a total breakdown, due to Aalen Bloom modifying the bodily
processes of the people in Sapience. Though with the emergence of new
herb processive techniques and putting extracts into compact forms
called "pills" some kind of "herb rush" started across the continent. On
another side, the surprising discovery of amazing properties of mugyik
testicles by Sir Axius Sor'Tirivian, wrested attention of people towards
creature parts. Though the innkeepers, whose inns were brimming with
people trying to drown their pain and sorrow, got the bad end of the
deal with the destruction of the sludge. Our finance advisors state
that, at the absence of a full-scale war the economy again faces the
risk of saturation but for the time being this stimulation has impacted
commerce across the continent positively.

3. PYLONS: THE TICKING SINGULARITIES AMONG US?

No wonder ylem is at the centre of our lives. A power source which can
be manipulated with Pylons in order to enhance our lives with infinite
possibilities. But is...this...an innocent power? Recent research has
shown that only minority of pylons work properly and even the working
ones pose the risk of contamination. This raises the question: Should we
deactivate them and get rid of these ticking massive singularities
standing right at the center of our homes? Some analysts forewarned us
about the possibility of contamination and stated that even if we could
seal the black ylem away...that is simply delaying the inevitable. While
Bloodloch and Spinesreach are quite open about their policies of
controlling and manipulating power, this raises a greater ethical burden
on Enorian and Duiran who present themselves as the protectors of Good
and protectors of Nature respectively. As Spirean Gazette it is our
responsibility to encourage our readers to choose their homes away from
these Pylons as far as possible.

4. SCIONS OF THE MAGI OR A RAG-TAG BUNCH OF ADVENTURERS?

Sciomancers are no doubt regaining their power and influence after the
Bloom incident and crystalline invasion. They are an integral part of
Spirean society and rightful heirs to the legacy left by the Magi.
Though a striking observation has been done by one of our reporters who
acquired a pair of enchanted spectacles to look through their legendary
wall of shadows. We wish to share the full account of our reporter: "It
was interesting to begin with. At one corner a monk was blunting her
fists upon a nearby dummy while a wolfish figure was chasing some
imaginary enemy, its tongue lolling right and left. Perched upon a high
point within the spire, apparently a giant female bat was brewing some
alcoholic beverages while a cat was smoking some cigarette near the bat.
And the most stupefying thing was that an unacceptably energetic woman
was running right and left paying no heed to the weirdness surrounding
her. The only close-to-sane thing I have seen was a brooding man
watching all this unfold around him with a scalpel in his hand, possibly
contemplating a vicious suicide. At that moment a hand appeared from out
of nowhere and broke my spectacles and said "Nothing to see here
citizen!" apparently it was a Syssin and I did not dally any longer!"
Stupefying, dear readers! The knowledge that Sciomancers are Mages who
are purveyor of arcane arts and elemental control might be requiring a
solid revision. No doubt the guild is a strong force of nature
but...maybe not a strong force of Mages befitting to the scions of the
Magi. But the final verdict is of course, yours dear readers.

-----Advertisements, Commercials and Stuff-----

- Feeling unsure about your future wife? Will you be rich and famous? Or
your next experiment will make you as powerful as a Chaos Lord? Lady
Mariena mesmerizes with mystical glances into your future. Come to
Aquila General Store in Spinesreach and you will -know- what lies ahead
for sure!

- Are you lost? Feeling lonely? Thirsty? Are you about to end your
existence in the middle of nowhere? We will get you somewhere! Shop at
Somewhere in Bloodloch for all your needed junk, its located somewhere
in Bloodloch."

- I am looking to become apprenticed to one who can Bacon, anyone who
can do so should contact me, I will be paying in gold. Contact: Daishin

- Primus Abhorash celebrated his 430th birthday. As usual no one was
invited to the celebrations. A few of our reporters found thoroughly
drained of their blood while trying to crash the party.

- Waiting right in the middle of tundra, all alone...if interested
attach a letter of love to the nearest mugyik. Alias: Vyxen Priestess

- OFFICIAL PUBLIC POLL (Please send your answers to our editors)

What should be the theme of Zaila's next outfit combination?

(a) Military, strong and assertive
(b) Nobility, frilly and full of colors
(c) Commoner, down-to-earth yet alluring

The results might be declared in the next issue!

Upcoming Publications:

1. Shade Guardian: Story of a woman wreathed in shadows who tries to
keep a group of misfits in line while they experience both dramatical
and comical events across Sapience.

2. Fishing Manual: All you need to know about your Kelki neighbours!
What makes them twitch, tick and vomit! A must have for every fishing
enthusiast!

3. Fifty Strikes of Daato: Based on a true story, this gruesome book
will keep you captivated throughout its full-length. Blood, gore and
unacceptable amount of violence will keep you awake through many nights.

4. Fallen for Ylem: A thorough analysis of ylem energy and the story of
hundreds who died for it. The proceeds of this book are planned to be
given to the veterans who have fought in these skirmishes.

5. Unanimous Vote: A political treatise upon Spinesreach election
system, ministries and struggles of the Senators.

-----Advertisements, Commercials and Stuff-----

***SPIREAN GAZETTE: EXCLUSIVE***

[A red haired hulking winged Atavian sitting upon a large pile of clay
golem limbs in a casual manner is depicted here]

As we trudged through the caverns of Bloodloch, it was hard for us to
keep our sanity intact for the screams of tortured mixing into ominous
sights of this oppressive city presented a thorough mental challenge.
Finally we were able to find the winged horror of Bloodloch and
incidentally the Regent and the Commander of Carnifex. Yes, dear
readers, Lady Alathesia was truly a sight to behold and as she smiled to
us her dimples were the definition of endless void, we had to avert our
eyes.

- Spirean Gazette: "Very well Regent Alathesia, can you tell us your
view upon Enorian and Duiran for our readers please?"

- Lady Alathesia: "Why yes Mister Reporter person I can. Let us begin
with Enorian shall we? As already stated, the Moths are quite a breed of
their own. They flock to that Flame thing in the temple, if you have
ever noticed. Its quite a sight to see the breed be so engulfed in the
Flame. Those that call themselves Luminaries, have to rely on an Angel
to fight because they do not understand what afflictions really are."

She pauses, sizing us up and down with her emerald eyes, we could do
nothing but hastily scribe whatever she says. One of our friends could
take it no longer and started to run towards the exit, leaving a trail
of hot water while walking.

- L.A.: "Oh! And don't get me started on Zealots, they are confused
-who- they are a bit of Sentaari a bit of Luminary."

- S.G.: "What about their policies towards your city, Commander?"

- L.A.: "Ascendrils, well you know why they play with water don't ya?
It's because of those damn Luminaries and Zealots starting fires
everywhere. Policies? They have no policies towards my city, they see
Shadow and run crying to enemy. Then beg to allow me to let them in my
city."

- S.G.: "And what about Duiran, my lady? Protectors of woods, shining
beacon of nature?"

- L.A.: "Ha! Sapience would be better off cutting down that old Oak. Do
you have any idea how much wood I could put in my commodities shop from
there? I am thinking about it, vials, pipes, books for years to come!
Sentinels rely on animals because people are too confusing for them to
interact with, and the only way they can make others stay in a room long
enough with them is to trap them. Then those Shaman people... they work
with plants because it's too hard communing with something that has a
brain."

- S.G.: "Do you have any immediate plan to cut down the Oak, Regent?
Shall we consider this as a determined desire to bolster Bloodloch's
booming economy?"

She remained silent but we could see something definitely was afoot. Of
course we could not dare to answer or insist further since Mr. Spires
warned us to return back to Gazette headquarters with minimal losses.
Though she continued upon the Oak.

- L.A.: "Its true! So much wood would be available. I wonder how many
Bloodlochians it would take to cut that damn thing down."

- S.G.: "Do you have any advices for your Spirean allies, Regent?"

- L.A.: "Lets see... Spireans. I would like to get them more involved
with us. Maybe offer some of the lava we have in the fissure. I fear
they are frozen in place at times. I would like to assist with this."

A few nervous chuckles were exchanged between our journalist compatriots
but we cut that short and decided to concentrate on the interview.

- S.G.: "Do you have anything special you would like to tell to our
readers?"

- L.A.: "Don't become a Moth, the Flame will kill you if you get too
close. I am accepting donations of pigs for baconry experimentation.
Also hiring a stone mason for a future house I wish to build. Oooh and
we accept those whom see how the light can be blinding and an affliction
hence wanting to live now in the shadows. Think about all the wood the
Oak can provide. Come to me with ideas."

We quickly thanked the Regent of Bloodloch and decided to find nearest
exit as soon as possible. We do hope our readers will appreciate the
risks we take in order to provide them hottest news and most exclusive
interviews across the continent.

--------------

Spirean Gazette is the leading source of information available to public
and published irregularly(on management's whim) from time to time. Don't
mix it with imitations which may come out in future. Spirean Gazette
year 465. All rights reserved.



Penned by my hand on Kinsday, the 15th of Slyphian, in the year 465 MA.


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