Step 1: Break into a private locale and attack someone. Preferably
someone of some fame, but anyone will do.

Step 2: Wait for retaliation.

Step 3: Be offended. (It's very important to be convincing here!) A
little crying, a little outrage. Men with effeminite posturings can pull
this off beautifully.

Step 4: Threaten retaliation for retaliation. (This is the big step!)

Step 5: Repeat steps 1-4 until on party or the other gets bored of the
game of "gotcha last".

This is a formula that will always make you out to look like a victim,
or even a hero, if you play your cards just right. It is foolproof, as
no one will ever see through your schemes for the truth of what they
are. Manipulation of the masses taken worldwide!

--- Excerpt from "Ancient Indoran Secrets: Getting What You Want Vol. I"
------ by Da--*scribbles* Anonymous

Penned by my hand on the 17th of Severin, in the year 155 MA.