Helix Amaratha, Scout of Lost Lands shouts, "No one can write a better
limerick than me."

Obviously, this was a direct challenge to Me. Therefore, I accept the
challenge and declare a Grand Limerick Contest. The contest will be
judged by a panel of the divine (not including Myself, though it would
be a grievous mistake to think that I cannot be perfectly impartial).
Contestants shall have 3 Aetolian months from this date (until Severin
of year 111) to complete any number of limericks and send them to
bards@aetolia.com. All limericks should be Aetolia-themed and thus
contain at least one proper noun found only in Aetolia. In other words,
limericks should include the name of an Aetolian person, place, or
immortal.

Please be sure that your limericks are 100% original. Adaptations of
well-known popular limericks will not be considered, and direct
plagiarism of another's work will be met with the usual punishment. And
believe Me, it's difficult to compose verse with only leaves for digits.

-Varian

Penned by my hand on the 8th of Slyphian, in the year 110 MA.